On this page, we talk about
Violence and abuse is when someone:
- hurts you
- scares you
- controls you.
We explain what it can be like to experience violence and abuse because of your
Your gender is what you feel and understand about who you are as a person.
You might think of yourself as a man or woman or something different.
You can choose the words that are right for you.
We also explain how you can get support.
There is support available if the information on this page upsets you.
You can find out more on our page about support.
What violence or abuse because of your gender is
Violence and abuse because of your gender can include:
- physical harm
- sexual harm
- emotional harm
- when someone controls you.
Sometimes it will be obvious when violence or abuse because of your gender is happening to you.
For example, if your partner or carer hurts you in a:
- physical way
- sexual way.
But sometimes it can be harder to realise when violence or abuse because of your gender is happening to you.
For example, if your doctor does things to you without your
When you give your consent, you say it is okay for someone to do something.
Your doctor might:
- give you a medical exam you do not need
- give you medicine you do not want.
Who can experience violence or abuse because of their gender
Violence or abuse because of your gender is never okay.
This includes if it is from:
- your partner, like a boyfriend or girlfriend
- your carer
- someone in the community.
You can get help if you experience violence or abuse because of your gender.
Some people are more likely to experience violence or abuse because of their gender.
For example, women and people.
A gender diverse person is someone:
- who feels like they do not fit the idea of being a man or a woman
- whose gender given to them when they were born does not match the gender they are.
People who are part of the community are also more likely to experience violence or abuse because of their gender.
The letters LGBTQIA stand for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer or questioning, intersex and asexual.
The ‘+’ is for people who are part of the LGBTQIA+ community but do not talk about themselves using a word from this list.
Where violence or abuse because of your gender can happen
Violence or abuse because of your gender can happen anywhere.
It can happen:
- where you work
- in your home
- in a group or organisation you are part of.
What you can do
If you have experienced violence or abuse because of your gender, you might feel:
- confused
- scared
- stressed.
People might try to make you think it is your fault.
Sometimes, it can be hard to leave a situation.
There are some steps you can take if you have experienced violence or abuse because of your gender.
We have information and resources on this website to help you get the support you need.
You can find out more on our page about support.
You can think about how you can be safe.
You can find out more on our page about staying safe.
You should take care of yourself.
You can find out more on our page about getting the most out of life.
How everyone can support each other
The United Nations Women suggest 10 things everyone can do to support people who experience violence or abuse because of their gender.
1. When someone speaks up, everyone should:
- listen to their story
- believe them.
2. Everyone should teach young people about violence or abuse that happens because of gender.
And everyone should listen to what young people have to say.
3. Everyone should ask for the support and services that people who experience violence and abuse because of gender need.
4. Everyone should understand what consent means.
5. Learn how you can:
- know when violence or abuse happens
- help.
6. Talk about violence or abuse with people:
- online
- in person.
7. Stand up to people who think is okay.
Sexual violence or abuse is when someone:
- makes you do sexual things you do not want to do
- does something sexual to you that you do not want them to do.
8. Give money to organisations that support women who experience violence or abuse because of their gender.
9. If you see someone behave in ways that might hurt people, you should:
- speak up
- do something to help.
10. Ask for more information.
Example story
We wrote a story to show an example of violence or abuse because of your gender.
The story we wrote is about a person called Quinn.
The story and the people in it are not real.
We made them up to explain violence or abuse because of your gender.
Quinn’s story
Quinn has a stepdad.
His name is Riki.
Riki believes Quinn should:
- marry someone
- take care of the home.
He believes these are things that women should do.
Quinn told her family she does not want to do these things.
Riki has behaved in ways that physically hurt Quinn when she has told him how she feels.
He told Quinn that because she is a person with disability, she:
- does not have any other options in her life
- will never get a job.
Quinn’s grandmother left her some money when she passed away.
Riki is keeping this money from Quinn until she gets married.
He has also stopped her from going to university to learn.
What Riki is doing to Quinn is violence or abuse because of her gender.
It is never your fault if you have experienced the bad behaviour we talk about on this page.
We are sorry that this has happened to you.
The first thing you should do is make sure you are safe.
If you or someone you know is in danger, call Triple Zero.
000
We have a section on this website about how to call Triple Zero.
You can find out more on our page about a guide to call Triple Zero.
You can contact 1800RESPECT for support.
You can call them.
1800 737 732
You can talk to someone online.
You can send them a text message.
0458 737 732
If you send them a text message, you can just send the word ‘HELLO’.
You can leave your partner if this is where you are experiencing the bad behaviour.
For example, your boyfriend or girlfriend.
You can find out more on our page about how to be safe when you leave a relationship.
If you are not ready to leave your partner, you can still make a plan about how to be safe.
You can find out more on our page about when you are not ready to leave a relationship.
You can get support from your friends and family.
It is a good idea to tell them:
- what they can do to help you
- to focus on what you need to feel safe.
You can keep proof of the person’s bad behaviour if it safe for you to do so.
You can give this proof to the police if you decide to contact them.
You can start to manage your own money so you can leave if or when you want to.
You can find out more on our page about managing your own money.
You can share what is happening to a government organisation.
For example, the Australian Human Rights Commission (AHRC).
AHRC is an organisation that makes sure people treat others:
- fairly
- equally.
You can call a helpline.
Helplines are phone numbers that will connect you to people who:
- care about what you are going through
- can give you good advice.
We have a list of helplines on our website.
You can find out more on our page about helplines.
You can work with someone to explore how you think and feel.
This can help you:
- reach goals
- feel safe
- learn skills
- understand what happened to you.
You can find out more on our page about counselling.
You can learn more about the rules about how people must treat you:
- fairly
- equally.
You can find out more on our page about your rights.
You can think about what you can do to care for yourself.
You can find out more on our page about caring for yourself.
You might have experienced the bad behaviour from someone who did a service for you.
For example, from:
- a health professional
- someone who cleaned your house.
You can talk to the person who organises your services if this has happened to you.
